9 years
I'm watching music videos. Feeling nostalgic. Rum on the rocks. And Akon's "I wanna love you" comes on. Such a simple melody and beat. "I wanna love you....but you already kno-ow." Somehow it epitomizes 2004. The years run together. I remember the song, the voice, the ding. I am taken back in time. 29. Devastated. Hurt. Alone. Rejected. Angry. I want...something back. Something I lost. Determined. It's not a good time. Clubs here and there. Dancing. Big city nights. Top Deck. Never trouble. But I am still drowning. Grasping for a branch. Dancing. Getting a number. Feeling reassured. Better. Knowing I wasn't pariah. I throw the number away. It did its job. Temporarily. Dangerous though. Stupid. And Akon plays in the background somehow. Maybe because he came at the beginning of the change. 9 years ago. Gradually balance sets in. Maturity. Self Control. The clubs are done. Back to normal. But the time passes. 30. 31. I am now 32. So ...